Mothering in Second Place

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival!

This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe’s Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today’s post is about mothering through breastfeeding. Please read the other blogs in today’s carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!


There are many benefits of being a stay-at-home parent. One of which is not favoritism. I go to school in the fall and spring, but in the summer I am a full-time SAHM. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love it. If I weren’t setting back my education by years and consequentially going into repayment of my student loans, I would stay at home 100% of the time all of the time. One of the downsides to staying at home is that I am no longer the preferred parent. When my husband leaves for the day, she’s following him out the door crying. When he gets home at night, she’s ecstatic. Most of the time lately when I ask her to say “mama” she says “dada” instead.

Daddy is the favorite—except when it’s time to nurse.

When it’s time to nurse, she is all over me. She wants me and only me—daddy simply will not do. Daddy can’t even distract her for a few minutes. She. Wants. Mama. NOW! When I’m sitting down preparing myself, she comes running across the room squealing. When she’s nursing, she wants to play with me. She loves me to kiss her on the forehead. She laughs the hardest when I tickler her while she’s nursing. Nursing is probably her favorite thing in the world right now and I am glad for it.

Sometimes on days when I feel like all she can do is whine at me, I nurse her and feel the rush of happiness hormones and suddenly forget my bad mood. Sometimes I nurse her just because I need to sit down for a minute instead chasing after her. Sometimes I nurse her just because I want to play while she’s doing it. Often, I just nurse her to reconnect.

There are many reasons why I started to nurse her. There are many reasons why I keep nursing her. There are many reasons why I plan on nursing her as long as she’ll let me. Within all of these reasons, there is one resounding theme—breastfeeding makes mothering easier.

 


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6 thoughts on “Mothering in Second Place

  1. absolutely. i miss this from my daughter who i’m no longer nursing. she wants daddy, all the way.

    but my nine-month old son? nothing beats being cherished (and cherishing) a nursing babe:)

    (i posted today about a brand-new mom who nursed at her infant’s baptism–such a picture of gracious mothering!)

  2. Pingback: Mothering Defined by Nursing « the BREASTFEEDING CAFE

  3. There isn’t a day that passes that I’m not glad for my boobs. I have a 10 week old son, and oh boy! those screaming matches are short and sweet once the boob comes into play!

    I’m not a full attachment parent, but I really resent people telling me my son is trying to manipulate me when he settles straight after being picked up. I’m his source of food, warmth, comfort and a clean bum… Why shouldn’t he be happy to be in my arms?

    That said, I love your blog, it has been a source of inspiration as I venture on my journey through motherhood. Thank you :)

    • I think it’s ridiculous that people try to say that babies are manipulating. They’re BABIES! Gah!

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