Tag Archives: Pregnancy

Preparing for Birth Series

A Little Bit of All of It Preparing for Birth Series

Hello and happy Memorial Day! I hope all of you are busy having fun with family and celebrating those who have served our country, along with others who have passed. I often think of my aunt and grandma and how much they’d love to know the girls. I’ll be sharing pictures I have of them with Peanut today to help her to remember those we’ve lost.

When you’re not busy with your family on this lovely holiday, please take a look at this wonderful series on birth created by Julia at A Little Bit of All of It. Every week, she’s sharing links to blogs on certain topics related to birth. It’s such a wonderful resource if you’re expecting!

I’ve submitted quite a few links that you’ll recognize if you were keeping up with my Granola Head’s Guide to a Natural Pregnancy. I’m hoping to write some more for future weeks too. I hope you all enjoy the series and find it as wonderfully informative as I have. If you have any posts you think will work for the upcoming weeks, please submit them! I’d love to read all of your stories.

Planning a Water Birth

Today’s guest post is from Maria, one of my readers. I’m always happy when someone enjoys my blog and even happier when I read their work and find I enjoy theirs too! This topics is near and dear to me because, while I never said I was “planning” a water birth, I knew I wanted it as an option and now that I’ve had one, I’ll never go back!

Water births are constantly gaining popularity and it’s no surprise why; they are known to reduce pain and stress for the mother and to give the baby a relaxing entry into the world. The warm water is supposed to be a similar environment to the amniotic sac so that when the baby is delivered they don’t feel the transition to be too stressful.

The Opinion of Others!

When you’re planning for a water birth, you may notice people trying to put you off the idea or scoffing at it. This is most likely because during a water birth you cannot have an epidural or anaesthetic. However, don’t let others influence your decision. If you have decided you wish to experience a pain-relief free labour then a water birth could be perfect for you as it is known to naturally reduce pain. It’s also known to reduce the chance of tearing the perineum therefore lessening the chances of the mother needing an episiotomy. If you do decide to have a water birth, remember you can always change your mind and leave the pool if you decide you want an epidural.

Where To Do It?

When you’ve made your decision that you want a water birth, perhaps you’ve been considering it since your first pregnancy symptoms, the first thing to do is to decide where you wish to give birth. If it’s at hospital, you need to speak to them to make sure they support water birth, will have a birthing pool available or whether they will let you bring your own birthing pool into the hospital. The hospital may charge an extra fee for use of the birthing pool so look around to see if you can purchase your own for cheaper. The alternative is to give birth at home. For this you will need to find a midwife who is experienced in home water births and you’ll need to buy your own pool.

Secondly you’ll need to find an obstetrician or midwife who is happy with your decision. Some may not feel comfortable with your decision to water birth so make sure in advance you will not face any pressure to change your mind unless there is a medical emergency.

Keeping an Open Mind

Throughout the pregnancy and labor you will need to keep an open mind about the birth. Sometimes it will not be safe to have a water birth and you will be recommended against it. As long as there are medical reasons for you not to water birth you should listen to your midwife or obstetrician and be ready to change your plans. It is not recommended that you water birth if you: have had any bleeding in late pregnancy; your baby is in distress; you’re going into labor early; you have herpes or other health problems such as diabetes, kidney disease and heart disease; you have high blood pressure or pre-eclampsia; your labor was induced; you’re having multiple births, your baby is in the breech position or your baby is very small.

Lastly, you should try to labor in the water else you may not have time to get into the pool before your baby comes. It is advisable not to get into the water too soon otherwise the warm water may stop your contractions in early labor. Before you go into labor you will want to find a birthing tub, a midwife or obstetrician who is willing to assist with your water birth and a fetoscope.

Maria loves writing and researching about pregnancy and helping other people to learn about the different options they have. She is a keen blogger and loves hearing stories about everyone’s birth experiences.

All About Books — You’re Going to Be a Big Sister!

Today’s guest post is from Gretchen at That Mama Gretchen. Not only does she have an awesome name, but her blog is fantastic! I got hooked on her a while back during her Wool Week and I’m so happy I found her blog! Now she’s expecting her second and I’m excited to hear her journey into being a mother of two. 

I’m so excited to pop in while Miss Meredith gets extra snuggles from her mama!

I blog over at That Mama Gretchen about life with my toddler and our new little baby on the way. To celebrate our latest little blessing Jemma and I trekked to the library to find some books about becoming a big sister.

Jemma is a total book girl. Most days she forgoes toys to flip through books and magazines. She “ooos” and “ahhhs” at animals, families, nature scenes, and goes crazy for books with touch ‘n feel features :) So, although she is just 16 months, I figured books would be the best way to begin talking about the new baby that will be moving in this August.

We found 4 fabulous books that each took a different spin on welcoming a baby …

Of course, Jemma adored Where Did That Baby Come From? since it featured kitties. I loved the illustrations in There’s Going to Be a Baby and What Baby Needswas very attachment friendly as it showcased babywearing by both parents, nursing, and cosleeping. But, best of all was Pecan Pie Baby! I won’t ruin the story, but will tell you that I appreciated the way the mama responded to her child’s concerns about a new baby. This mama found a common ground for the three of them (mama, toddler, and baby) to connect is a special way. It was super sweet and I hope to find a similar way for Jemma and I to envelope a new baby into our special bond.

I’m sure this isn’t our first round of big sister books and I’d love to hear your recommendations! Please share your favorites – our library card is waiting to be put to use again!

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If you are interested in other blog posts about welcoming new siblings, these are a few of my recent read:

Mama to my sweet girl, Jemma, and another expected to arrive this summer! I share about our days over at That Mama Gretchen sprinkled with memos about our attachment parenting experience, thrifty finds, crafty projects, and our goal of becoming more green. Stop by for a visit, we’d love to have you! You can also find me on Twitter, Facebook, and my favorite, PINTEREST!

The Most Pregnant I’ve Ever Been

39 Weeks 4 Days

I know it’s entirely normal for moms to go past their due date. I know that Twig will come when s(he) is ready. I know that things like dilation and effacement don’t matter in terms of when a baby will actually come. Regardless, I am going nuts!

As of today, 40 weeks and 5 days pregnant, I am the most pregnant I have ever been. With Peanut, I went into labor when I was 40 weeks and 3 days and she was born in the very early hours of 40 weeks and 5 days. I thought that possibly the math could be off because with Peanut it was based on my first day of my last period, but if I put that date for this pregnancy into the calculator, my due date is actually one day earlier than my due date based on my date of ovulation.

40 Weeks 1 Day - The Amazing Belly Drop!

Yeah, I know that due dates don’t matter. Due dates don’t mean expiration dates. I’ve been preaching this all along! It’s just so much harder to keep my convictions when I just want this baby to be here. In my family and friends’ defense, no one has really been bothering me about whether or not the baby has come yet. I was purposefully vague with my due date, even though it would be easy to calculate based on my posts here and I did announce that it was my due date on Facebook. I announced at the same time that no one was allowed to ask me if the baby had come yet and people have respected that. My plan if people start asking is to simply delete the comment and move on.

I know that this baby will come when s(he) is ready. I know that extra time cooking is a good thing and that life really is easier with the baby inside. I am still trying to cherish the last days that Peanut is an only child and I’m trying to pamper myself as much as possible in preparation for the lack of being able to in the near future. I’m trying to rest, even though my body decided to wake up at 4:50am this morning and wouldn’t go back to sleep. I’m as prepared as I can possibly be. Now I just have to wait.

This baby is already trying to teach me patience.

Making the Most of My Time

40 Weeks 0 Days. Baby has dropped over the last two weeks!

Today is my due date. First off, this does not mean that you’re allowed to start asking me every day if I’ve had the baby yet. I’ve decided that Facebook posts that ask me will be deleted (I already had to delete one yesterday), texts will go without response, etc. If I feel frustrated at someone prying about this baby being born, I’m just simply going to ignore it. It’s not worth getting myself upset (by having conversations with all these people about how the baby hasn’t come yet) or hurting my relationships (by reacting badly to their comments).

But that’s not the purpose of today’s post. Today I’m talking about the little bit of time we have left as a family of three.

After the prodromal labor two weeks ago, I was really sent into high gear. When I thought I was in labor, I realized how unprepared I really was. I had the big things done, but things would still be a mess if I went into labor right then. So I took the following week really paring down my “To Do Before Baby” list and was intensely satisfied when it was as completed as possible (with some things that had to wait until a certain day or other event to happen still on it). My house was the cleanest it had ever been, everything I needed to do for the next couple of months was in order, and I was sitting there waiting.

I found myself re-cleaning things that had already been cleaned. I felt horribly impatient. I felt angry at the other moms on Twitter who were having their babies. I felt grouchy and irritable and just sooo tired of being pregnant.

Then I realized how this is all effecting Peanut. She had to deal with the mom who was being a grouch. She had to deal with the mom who wasn’t paying enough attention to her because she was busy. She gets the short end of the stick and after the baby comes, it’ll get even worse. So I decided that the rest of my time will be spent absolutely adoring my daughter.

I know we’ll find a new normal, but for a while things are going to get really tough for her. She’s so excited to meet the baby (and hold it and play with it and take a bath with it), but I don’t think she really realizes that things will be different for her. There will be extra stress and there will be less time devoted to her. It’s just a fact when you have two kids. There will be an adjustment. So until this baby comes, I’m spending my time playing with her, cuddling with her, and just giving her all the attention I possibly can. Hopefully it’ll help her with the changes to come.

Today I am 40 weeks and 0 days pregnant. The dreaded due date. I’ve been crampy and can hardly sleep, no matter how much I try. Heartburn is still killer, which doesn’t seem fair considering it’s supposed to calm down when the baby lowers. At my midwife appointment yesterday she said my body looks “more ready” and my bump is moving lower. This, of course, also means I’m getting some awesome pelvic pressure. Also peeing every 5 minutes and can’t poo for the life of me. Yeah, I know you wanted to know that.

Prodromal Labor

38 Weeks 0 Days While I thought I was in labor.

Prodromal… I feel like that word mocks me.

I spent the majority of New Years Eve thinking I was in labor. It finally ended at around 2 or 3 am New Years day with a shot of vodka (with expressed consent from my midwife) and no baby.

From what I’ve read online, prodromal labor is often thought to be synonymous with pre-labor or Braxton Hicks contractions. This isn’t always necessarily true. What I experienced two days ago progressed and was painful. While I did spend a good part of the day in denial, in the end I truly thought I was in labor. I even felt an urge to push (though that may have been in my head, I’m not sure).

Contractions started at 10am and I mostly ignored them. I didn’t time them or anything of that sort, but they felt different. There was pain in my lower abdomen and rather than being an uncomfortable tightening like Braxton Hicks, they felt more like menstrual cramps. Possibly like a bad stomach ache. I thought possibly I just needed to use the restroom, so I tried that a few times with no relief. I also noticed a significant increase in urination. If even the tiniest bit was in my bladder, I needed to go immediately.

After around an hour and a half of contractions, I started to wonder. We went for a walk around the block to see if it would slow things down. They were coming regularly (though I still wasn’t timing), so we decided that we should run out to get some last minute things (read: hose and adapter for filling the birth pool) just in case this was really it. While we were out, I felt an intense urge to be at home. I wanted my nest. We called the midwife to say this might be it so she’d be forewarned and she said to call again when they were five minutes apart.

After eating lunch, I put Peanut down for her nap. Nursing made the contractions stronger, but they calmed once she unlatched. I started timing contractions on an app I downloaded so I could tell my husband about them since he wasn’t in the room and they were around 6 minutes apart. I tried to nap myself, but couldn’t, so I took a bath. It didn’t slow things, though I will admit it’s difficult to really relax when my tub is so pathetically small. By this point I had tried all five things to tell if I was in real labor according to The Bradley Method: drink, eat, take a walk, take a bath, nap (though I couldn’t nap through the contractions).

By 8PM, I was thinking we were having a baby that night. Things were progressing slower than I had anticipated, but they were getting stronger and closer together. I called my mother and had her come over to tend Peanut during bedtime and sleep and she arrived a while later with some food I asked her to grab at the store. They went to bed. We called the midwife when they were 5 minutes apart and she told us to call when we wanted her to come. I decided to rest for a while since I figured I wouldn’t have another chance any time soon. It took a long time, but I finally started falling asleep, only to be woken by an incredible antsy feeling like I needed to get up and move.

I tried the birth pool, which we had filled earlier, but it was too hot. I decided to go downstairs and watch Arrested Development while bouncing on the birth ball. By this point the contractions were around 2-3 minutes apart. After a little while I started feeling incredibly annoyed by the show, so we headed back upstairs. I tried to rest again, but to no avail. I started feeling incredibly shaky and wanted to get in the pool again. This time it was very nice. My husband determined that I was in transition and that we needed to get the midwife to our house.

She arrived and set up her supplies. My husband was in the pool with me helping me through contractions and I started feeling an urge to push. I even pushed for a little while before requesting the midwife check my cervix. When she did, I was still at the exact same dilation as I was five days earlier.

She explained to me that this sometimes happens with prodromal labor. These weren’t Braxton Hicks, but rather something in between Braxton Hicks and true labor contractions. In hindsight, I can see that they should have been more intense. They were progressing, but I guess I just assumed I was having an easier-than-normal labor. They were painful, but nothing in comparison to my last labor, but I had decided that was because this baby is in the correct position. It was progressing slowly, but I figured that progression that doesn’t stop with change in activity is still progression.

I felt devastated that I wasn’t meeting Twig that night. I felt humiliated that I had thought it was the real thing. I felt sorry that I dragged the midwife out of bed in the middle of the night. While my husband and the midwife cleaned up the supplies and drained the birth pool, I sat in the bathroom and cried. I felt so silly. Like the woman that rushes to the hospital at the first twinge in her abdomen.

The midwife told me to take a shot of vodka (which she said was essentially what they’d give you in a hospital to stop contractions) and get a good night rest. She hugged me and told me over and over how she had the exact same thing happen with two of her babies. Throughout all of this the contractions continued, which felt like my body was betraying me somehow. How could it still continue when I knew it was fake?

I fell into a deep sleep that night and didn’t wake until 11am the next day. Since I had written her a note before going to bed, my mother knew what was going on and took Peanut to her house. It felt so good to hug my Peanut when my mom brought her back shortly after I woke. I felt teary-eyed all morning (or I suppose afternoon given the time I woke) and slept with Peanut for 2.5 hours during her nap, which made me feel much better. I still feel upset about the whole incident and how it made me feel, but I’m sure that will lessen even more once the baby really does come. I feel foolish even sharing the story here, but when I went searching for information on prodromal labor I felt like the internet was missing information on what I went through. So I want you to know that if you’ve gone through this, you’re not alone.

I am now 38 weeks and 3 days pregnant. If I sit for too long, my ribs kill kill me (though according to all those pregnancy sites I should be getting some relief from that since the baby is low now, uh NOT). If I stand for too long my feet kill me. My tailbone hurts. I can’t sleep in because my ribs are killing me by the time that I wake up in the morning. I spend all night tossing and turning. My heartburn kills.

Nevertheless, I’m happy to have a little extra time. We’re getting some stuff done around the house that I know we won’t want to once the baby comes and that makes me happy. I’m also getting rid of all the small things on my pre-baby to do list. I’m certainly not doing anything to hurry this along if just to not go through that whole fiasco again.

Two to Three

This started as a post about my relationship with Peanut and my fears on how it will change after Twig is born. How nearly every day she tells me “Mama, you’re my best friend.” and how I sincerely feel the same about her. How I’m concerned that I won’t be able to give her the love and attention that she needs once I have a newborn to care for on top of that.

Don’t get me wrong, that is still a huge part of it, but I realized it also in large part how we’ll change as a family once we go from three to four.

I’ve been re-reading The Baby Book to prepare myself for what it’s going to be like to have a newborn again and I’ve gotten to the section on after the baby is actually born. Even with all the preparing I’ve been doing for the early days when I’m constantly nursing and Peanut is bored and our house is a mess, I didn’t really comprehend how different it will really be until last night. How our lives will never be the same as parents of two children as opposed to one child.

How will I find time for intimacy with my husband? Yes, of course there’s sex, but more than just that. I think it took a full year after Peanut was born until we just sat down and cuddled again. At least that’s how I remember it in my mind. Even when we did find time for us as a couple, we were constantly interrupted by a baby then toddler. How will we even begin to find time to just sit down together and watch a movie when we have a toddler and a baby both pining for our attentions?

How will I give Peanut the time and focus she deserves? I already feel like a failure as a parent that she’s getting so much TV right now with me being hugely pregnant and just not wanting to move or leave the house. I found myself incredibly irritated at my in-laws the other day for letting her watch TV at their house until I stepped back and realized I wouldn’t have cared before because she wasn’t getting so much at home. I don’t think she’s gone a single day in the last two weeks without at least two episodes of Dinosaur Train. I know that my attention and energy will just be further drained when Twig arrives, so how do I possibly expect things to change? When I don’t even feel like sitting on the floor and playing with her now, how will I accomplish it when I have a newborn to hold at the same time?

I know that everyone is going to say that things just work. We’ll find a rhythm again and a family of four will be our new norm. I know the early days will be hard, but we’ll eventually get things figured out. I know that my concerns about giving my daughter enough and my husband enough will work themselves out as my heart opens further to welcome our new addition. I know all of this, yet I still sit her and worry and cry and feel awful for bringing this on my family. I was the one who really wanted another baby, so why am I the one crying about it?

Because I’m a huge ball (pun intended) of pregnancy emotions and acne and irritation and mood swings and aches. Because I haven’t had a normal night sleep in weeks and I know I won’t be getting one any time soon. Because I’m allowing myself to get stressed out about Christmas and Twig’s arrival and school and anything else that I can possibly be stressed about. Because I’m pregnant. Blah!

Nearing Full-term and Stress

This is what I look like at 6:30am when I can't sleep--dirty mirror, burnt out lightbulb, and all. 36 weeks 2 days

I am a big ball of stress.

Christmas is coming and I’m not going to have half of the gifts I’m knitting finished in time. Twig is coming and I feel like my list is incredibly long considering that I thought I had nothing to do a few months ago. Money is tight and I still have things I need to get for Christmas and Twig, not to mention regular household expenses and a few bigger ticket items I need to buy like cat food and laundry detergent. My house is a mess. I am still not over this dang cold even though the husband and Peanut have been better for a week. I just feel stressed out.

Really though, it’s not that much in the end. I keep trying to remind myself of that. People don’t care if their Christmas gifts are a little late. A lot of the stuff I need to do or get for Twig isn’t really necessary before he/she is born. Money will work itself out, even if it’s more tight that I was planning on it being this month. The house will eventually get clean, even if we have to eat out of tupperware for a while. I’m giving up and going to the doctor, so that should take care of the cold. We will survive. Life is not that bad. These are all middle class problems. Things could be much worse.

In spite of that last paragraph, I am still a big ball of stress!

How did you get rid of stress in the last days of pregnancy? Someone please tell me that it doesn’t matter if we don’t order a new Nose Frida before Twig arrives!

I am now 36 weeks and 2 days pregnant. The cold symptoms have let up enough that I am readily able to notice the awful heartburn again, but not enough that I am able to get the little amount of sleep that my pregnant body and toddler trying to kick me off the bed allows me to get. I literally woke up over a dozen times last night. Ugh.

Speaking of heartburn, I was all excited when the books and other such calendars started telling me that the baby could “drop” soon. Relief from the heartburn and shortness of breath! Yay! Oh wait, since you’re a second-time mom, the baby likely won’t drop until you’re in labor. WTF? That is so not fair.

Speaking of not fair, what’s up with these Braxton Hicks contractions? It’s said that they’re not supposed to be painful, but I beg to differ. It used to be just when something was touching my belly, but now I frequently find myself stopping to breathe. Certainly not as painful as labor contractions, but also certainly not painless. My midwife told me at my last appointment that I’m “nice and tight” in my belly, so maybe that makes them worse? Either way, all this pre-labor better mean that I don’t have to work as hard in real labor. If only it worked that way, huh?

I’ve also developed this lovely new symptom of incredible rib pain that won’t go away. It kept me up half the night tossing and turning two nights ago. My midwife showed us this super cool thing to help move the baby around and that usually makes it subside. I can’t remember the name of it, but you fold a sheet in half “hot-dog style” and the pregnant woman lays on it in the middle, then the partner grabs one end of the sheet in each hand and pulls them straight up. The partner then pulls each side alternately for a minute or so. It makes me feel like I’m on the agitate cycle of my washing machine. Try it out!

Call For Guest Posts!

I decided to insert a cute picture of Peanut when she was a newborn because I'll have another one of these soon. Ah!

I am nine months pregnant. The final stretch. Wow.

This fact has been playing in the back of my mind for some time now, but as a general rule I just push it aside. I have been thinking for weeks that I still had finals and Christmas before the baby comes. Now the semester is over and Christmas is less than two weeks away. Technically I could have the baby on Christmas eve and still be “full-term”. Though I am obviously not counting on it, I’m still amazed that I am so impossibly close.

So with what sometimes feels like the impending doom of my becoming a mother of two, I decided I need to really get planning. I need to get my home ready for the birth, I need to get myself ready for the birth (though obviously I’ve already been working on that one), and I need to get my blog ready for the birth. Hence the call for submissions!

Would YOU like to be featured on this blog? Well it’s fairly simple! Just send me an idea or a post and viola! Alright, maybe not quite that simple.

Hobomama, a blogger that I quite enjoy reading wrote a post about the guidelines for a guest blogger when her newest addition was on the way that I’m just going to reference here. She is very well-spoken (or -written, I suppose in this case) and thought this out very thoroughly. Her guidelines are much more than I would have even begun to think of (like reposts are okay, but they have to be 90 days old). I hope you don’t mind me borrowing your knowledge and planning.

In regards to content: anything that goes along with the theme of this blog (breastfeeding, natural parenting, etc.) is A-okay, but there are certainly some topics I am particularly interested in because of the purpose of this hiatus.

  • Birth stories, particularly home birth
  • Life with two children
  • Caring for a toddler and a newborn simultaneously (eek!)
  • Co-sleeping with two
  • Tandem nursing
  • Minimalism and babies
  • Budgeting and babies
  • Surviving the postpartum days

Of course, things that aren’t traditionally featured on this blog are welcome also. I am always interested in new insights.

I’m not going to put an official deadline on any of this since I didn’t give the greatest amount of time to create said guest posts, but I ask you to keep in mind that Twig is due mid-January, therefore the earlier the better. Please send submissions or questions to theadventuresoflactatinggirl {at} gmail {dot} com.

Pain Medication For Sutures

Sicky at 35 Weeks 2 Days

Continuing with the theme of discussing items mentioned in my birth plans, I’ve gotten quite a reaction from one line.

Of course, I would like all precautions taken to avoid tearing. If tearing does happen, I do not want local pain medication to repair.

Or alternately stated in my hospital birth plan:

If stitching is required, do so without the use of pain medication.

Everyone wants to know why in the world I would want someone coming at my girlie bits with a needle without numbing me up first. I don’t blame you. Before Peanut’s birth (and the subsequent transfer to the hospital) I would have thought it equally insane.

When Peanut was born, I tore both up and down. My hospital midwife said that it could have happened just the same if I were in her care, but having spent quite a time analyzing Peanut’s birth (don’t we all?), I would bet that I at least wouldn’t have torn so severely. All the books tell you to stop pushing when you feel the ring of fire. Ease up for a moment, let your body stretch. Every woman tells you that is the most difficult thing to do at that particular moment. In my case, I would say that my inability to stop pushing during the ring of fire was even more intense because I was in panic mode.

People always compliment us on how we handled our accidental home birth. Really, we did amazingly well for our situation. Regardless of that fact, we still were in (what I call) panic mode. This is what happens in an emergency when you lose all track of time and just act. Your only priority is to fix the situation. I think that this reaction is why it took me time to “get over” Peanut’s birth not going as planned, even though it had all the basic requirements (healthy baby, intervention-free, vaginal, etc.). Her birth was not peaceful for me–it was panic.

When I realized that she was coming right now, I didn’t have time for shock and awe. I didn’t stop to analyze. My knee-jerk reaction was to Get. Her. Out. I wanted the situation that had caused the panic to be resolved. I wanted to make sure she was okay. So when I felt that ring of fire, I pushed. Not only did I push, but I pushed harder. I used all my reserves and I got her out. It’s always been amazing to me watching birth videos where you see the baby’s head gradually coming out, then there’s a pause where the head is out and the body is in, then one final push to get the baby’s body out. For me (while I admit that I don’t have the clearest memory of this time), it was like one big push. I felt her head was probably an inch or two from crowning, tried to get into a squatting position (which didn’t work because my husband was getting ready to catch her and my mother-in-law couldn’t support me squatting like I needed) and when that didn’t work, got onto all fours and pushed. There could have been more than one actual push, but there weren’t minutes between. There wasn’t a pause. The baby was coming, so I got her out.

Of course, after transferring to the hospital, the OB that was on call stitched my tears. While I was no longer in panic mode, I most certainly was in shock. I remember giving no forewarning what was happening, I remember it being incredibly painful over and over, and I remember trying to tell her to stop (which she did not listen to). In my memory, I was jabbed probably as many times as the amount of stitches I actually received. Then there was the incredible burning of the numbing drugs. In my mind, it was the worst part of my birth.

Of course, I realize that all of this is likely over-exaggerated in my mind. I realize that it probably wasn’t so many jabs and she was probably much nicer than I remember (though they told me she had just done 3 births pretty much simultaneously and wasn’t not in a good mood, so she probably wasn’t super nice either). It probably would have hurt worse to have her stitch me up and down without pain medication. Regardless, I do not want to experience that again.

So that’s what prompted me to put in my birth plans that I do not want pain medication. After discussing it with my midwife, we will evaluate it at the time. She said I am no more likely to tear having done so in the past (she said she had 3 episiotomies and then went on to have 5 tear/cut free births). She also said that if the tear is minor, she likely won’t stitch at all. Even if I do need stitches, there are other options besides the injectable numbing medication. She understands my previous experience and is willing to work with me. One of the many reasons I love having a home birth midwife.

I am now 35 weeks and 2 days along. We’re still getting over our nasty cold over here, so honestly pregnancy-related complaints have been the least of my worries over the last couple of weeks. It sure does suck being sick while pregnant. It’s also difficult to ascertain whether a symptom is “just pregnancy” or something related to the cold. Things like my shortness of breath and inability to eat much are likely related to both. I’ve also “surrendered” and taken Guaifenesin a couple of times today. What was just nasal and throat has now moved into my chest and I was getting concerned about pneumonia (which I was lucky enough to get at the beginning of this year, likely due to my asthma). The medication made breathing much easier, which I would like to see as a sign that it’s not pneumonia, but only time will tell.